About Me

My photo
I'm just a 28 year old woman that married the man of my answered prayers on July 18, 2009. We have our sweet Ella that was born in September of 2010 and our precious Charlotte that was born in February of 2012! On March 24, 2013, our first son was born, Josiah Warner. After a complicated pregnancy, he was born very prematurely and lived less than an hour before going to be with Jesus. Through life's ups and downs, I'm trying to figure out how to follow Jesus. I mean, really follow Jesus. The kind of following where things start to change. It's time to put action to the passion

Sunday, May 30, 2010

Baby Update!

Baby belly at 24 weeks!

Hey Gang!

We had a doctor's appointment on Friday morning and baby looked great! My belly growth was right on track. Actually, a little above. It always seems to be measuring a week ahead. For example, my last appointment I was 21 weeks and measuring for 22 weeks. This appointment I was 24 weeks and measuring 25 weeks. I told John on the car ride home, I am hoping that means the baby is developing a week earlier and will be here sooner! Rather than the baby coming right on time and I deliver the world's largest baby (isn't that every pregnant woman's nightmare?!). And, somehow, despite my belly measurements, I am only up six pounds from my pre-pregnancy weight. I was concerned about it, but the doctor wasn't at all. And, I guess he's right because I did lose a lot in the first trimester, so when you factor that in, I'm probably right on track.

The baby's heartbeat was nice and strong as well! And, we still don't know the gender :o) We decided to keep it a secret and my doctor's office doesn't record the gender in the chart when you don't want to know what the secret is. That way, no one slips up in the office and unless we pay for an extra ultrasound somewhere, we have no way of knowing now! I was so terrified that we would have waited all this time and get to full term or something and someone would slip, mentioning the gender. I am so glad we don't have to worry about that! Honestly, that was an answer to one of my ridiculous prayers!

The baby still moves around a lot. I was looking forward to the baby kicking the doctor while he was listening for the heartbeat and stuff. BUT, the baby must have known there was a doctor in the room and time to settle down because the baby stopped squirming as soon as the doctor came in. I mean, lots of squirming before and after but not during. Oh well. Maybe I can explain to the child how funny I would find that and he or she needs to kick hard next time.

The Lord has taught me (again) how to enjoy the blessing of this baby every single day. It is very easy to get worried and wonder what might happen (yes, I still get anxious despite the milestones we have passed). Some days I still feel that, "waiting for the rug to get pulled out from under us" feeling. It's not fun. At all.

But, I am blessed beyond measure to now be carrying a second baby. No matter what bad or good happens through this pregnancy and in this child's life, God is to be praised. He is in control and I know that. I just need to do a better job at my part of the deal which is to daily lay this baby back at His feet. Of course there are days when I want to say that I did that last time and things didn't happen the way I wanted them to happen. But, God is gracious enough to remind me over and over again that He really does have it under control. And, I, for certain, know that He's got a better grip on things than I do.

So, for today, I am blessed and overjoyed to have a little baby kicking around as I type this blog! And, I am beyond thrilled to know that the Lord has this baby and will do what brings Himself the most glory. With knowing that, I know this baby is loved and taken care of beyond what I can do. Glad to know the Lord somehow loves this baby even more than I do!

Wednesday, May 26, 2010

Cursed Are The Ones That Can't Abide

Galatians 3:10 "For all who rely on works of the law are under a curse; for it is written, "Cursed be everyone who does not abide by all things written in the Book of the Law, and do them." "

Embracing Accusations by Shane and Shane

"The father of lies

Coming to steal

Kill and destroy
All my hopes of being good enough
I hear him saying "Cursed are the ones
Who can’t abide,"
he’s right
Alleluia he’s right!

The devil is preaching
The song of the redeemed
That I am cursed and gone astray
I cannot gain salvation
Embracing accusation

Could the father of lies
Be telling the truth
Of God to me tonight?
If the penalty of sin is death,
Then death is mine
I hear him saying "Cursed are the ones
Who can’t abide,"
He’s right
Alleluia he’s right!

Oh the devil’s singing over me
An age old song
That I am cursed and gone astray.
Singing the first verse so conveniently
he’s forgotten the refrain...

Jesus saves!
He redeemed us from the curse of the law,
He redeemed us from the curse of the law,
He redeemed us from the curse of the law! "

Galatians 3:13 "Christ redeemed us from the curse of the law by becoming a curse for us—for it is written, "Cursed is everyone who is hanged on a tree"— so that in Christ Jesus the blessing of Abraham might come to the Gentiles, so that we might receive the promised Spirit through faith."

If you have never heard this song by Shane and Shane, you need to close this blog, open up iTunes, and buy the song now. I still have not forgotten when I first heard them perform it in 2006 before it was released on their next album. I have absolutely adored it (and cry though it each time) ever since.

Lately, I've just been feeling defeated. Discouraged. Can't get it right and don't even know where to begin to get it right. Don't you hate that feeling? What I hate even more is that sometimes I let the feeling dwell and it just becomes stronger lies from the enemy. 

Earlier today, John sent me a text asking if I could pray for him about something. Of course, I immediately replied back that I was praying that instant. And, I did. But, all of these thoughts came floating through my head (which I know from Scripture to be untrue and from my relationship with the Lord), that I just simply wasn't good enough to be lifting those requests. Then, it starts of thinking I'm not the wife I should be, the mother I should be, on and on and on. 

So, once I pushed through the thoughts I knew were not true, I continued to pray for my husband. Then, I took some homemade peanut butter cookies to him at work, hehe :o) On the way home, I randomly decided to listen to this song by Shane and Shane. But, as I now know, it was no random choosing. The Lord knew I needed to be reminded of the truths found in Galatians 3 through song. 

All of the lies sung over me by the devil, are actually the song of the redeemed. The devil is right, I can't do it on my own. I am in no way good enough. I can't gain salvation. But, what he forgets to tell me is the most beautiful part, despite all of that junk, Jesus saves. And, even more importantly to me today that I needed to be reminded of, is that Jesus saved ME. And, I need His salvation even more today than the first day I called out to Him. I love days like today where I feel the wonder and necessity of Jesus stronger than anything else (and, when I can feel a little baby dancing around in my belly and pray that he or she experiences the same wonder one day)

Friday, May 21, 2010

Daddy's Baby Already!

So, it turns out we are already 23 weeks and 3 days pregnant!! Time has been flying on by lately! Probably because we have been so stinkin' busy with the move and lots of fun house guests. I am definitely not complaining that time is moving a lot faster than it did before. And, while I do still get nauseous from time to time, it seems like the vomiting stage (other than a fluke a week ago) ended at 20 weeks. So, woohoo for not puking all the time now! I could NOT be more grateful that the puking did eventually stop and I am not one of the lucky women that deals with it for the whole 9 months.

I first felt this sweet baby move at 15 weeks and the movements have only gotten stronger. And, a lot more frequent. Let's just say that these days, the baby must not sleep much because the child has figured out how to do somersaults and cool breakdance moves in the weightless habitat. My belly does look very alien-like on a regular basis starting this last week. We're talking, "um, I think a little foot could bust through at any moment," type of movements. And, the crazy wave-like movements of my tummy all over the place. The movements are above my belly button sometimes, and below sometimes. Every once in a while there's a left side jab, but the baby seems to like my right side better.

For the most part, the baby just moves whenever he or she feels like it (which seriously doesn't matter whether it's day or night, if I've had sugar or not, the kiddo likes to bust a move constantly). But, there is one thing I've noticed that brings the baby to freakout mode, jump all around, trying to bust straight through my uterus and tummy into the world to give me a piece of their mind...

when daddy is no longer around.

Whenever daddy's voice is absent, the baby protests by beating up my insides and rolling around like a mad child.

Shortly after John leaves for work...when he leaves the room...when he stops talking at bedtime, etc...the baby goes crazy. It's as if the baby is screaming and is trying to ask what the mess happened to his or her daddy.

Don't worry, I plan to make sure this child understands how much I puked, how many times my back gave out to where John had to scoop me up and carry me to my destination, and how I birthed the child into the world. I am determined to make sure this baby loves me as much as he or she obviously loves daddy.

But, baby, I think you're right about your daddy. He is just as amazing as you think he is and much more. I can't wait for you to meet him. He's so much fun. And, makes me laugh like no one else on earth. Also, he'll do anything you ever need. If you want to learn a trick, he's super nice and giving, he would give you the world on a string if he could.

Baby, I'm glad you already love him so much. Because, I always want to protest when he has to go to work and things, too. It's just not as socially acceptable for me to kick around like you do when he leaves...